the rhythm is gonna get you

last night i walked in on a "jam session". after a few minutes harrison got angry about something. (3 year old. go figure.) i picked up my camera and started rolling. it's just so funny to me to watch harrison's face as his attitude changes. no comments about the "drums". in case you hadn't heard...we're in a recession. :)

such a good mommy.....

this is an old video I stumbled across while organizing my snapfish albums. Its harrison. he was just barely over 12 months old. he was playing on this very old glider chair we have on the porch and when my back was turned he slipped down into a hole in the center. so, what does mom do? run to help? panic? check for injuries? oh heck no. run! grab the camera. and today, I am so glad i did. i cant believe how big my little man is now. this makes me laugh out loud. and tear up a bit. time moves so very fast.

playing with friends

living in college station has been tough. i originally came here to go to school. like everyone one else here. i met tim here and we got married and we just never left. we've grown to love it here but it's tough. people come and go so much. i realize we live in a college town and every 4 years (okay- 5 for some-) we get a whole new crop of friends. and we lose a huge group of friends. but it's not just the college students. it seems as though this town also runs off our precious not college friends too. the merrymans, the redwines, the jameses, boozer, the parents-in-law, the brother and sister-in-law, i could go on and on. all day. i've seen so many friends leave that i think i want to start some kind of "state your intent" rule before becoming close friends. what are your intentions here in college station? do you plan to stay long term? what is your commitment level to staying here? i think if people answer those questions we can then determine our level of friendship. i am sort of kidding. i have been blessed with many friends but it is so painful to constantly be saying goodbye. all of this to say, today at our playgroup (the picture is from playgroup today), i was with a couple friends who i am so glad are here. they seem to be long term but as i drove away, i was struck with a fear, what if they leave too? then a settling thought. "we have eternity together. this life is but a blink." i am so glad that some of you guys have been a part of my blink.

lockett

Lockett 6 months old. 1-21-09

My precious little lockett. he is just so very different than harrison. it's been a joy to watch two completely different personalities and BODIES come from the same two people. God is so good. here are a few little known facts about my lockett.

His name comes from my dad's family (EVERYONE always asks). The name lockett was the maiden name of a lady who married into the hadden family and from then on there was always a boy named lockett in the family until recently. the name disappeared and tim and i decided to bring it back. lockett's middle name is ray. tim's middle name. tim's dad's middle name. tim's dad's dad's middle name...... you get the picture.

Lockett was born early. a little over a month early because i was having serious heart problems. i was put on bed rest (total torture-you wouldnt think so, but it is) for a few weeks to try to keep lockett healthy, happy and INSIDE me. i went in for a regular visit (my one reason to get out of bed) on tim's birthday, july 21. it was supposed to be a check up because i was about a month away from my due date. the doctor realized my heart was in more trouble and it was affecting lockett. we went straight to have the c-section. on tim's birthday. lockett was born and was in a bit of respiratory distress and his blood pressure was struggling (probably because i had been on beta blockers for my heart). they took him to the NICU and took me to have sonograms and cat scans for heart and blood clot problems. i was fine except livid that i couldnt be with lockett. i just shut my eyes and prayed with fervor for lockett to be okay. i dont think i opened my eyes once during all the testing. several hours later they wheeled me in (on my bed) to see lockett in the NICU. i was only able to touch his foot. he was still struggling, on oxygen, and had doctors all over him. the neonatalogist assured me he would be okay. they drugged me a bit and wheeled me to my room. i passed out. tim paced the halls praying that lockett would make it. i was awoken 24 hours later and wheeled once again to see lockett. this time i held him and nursed him. wires and all. he was so little. the time went to fast. the next day when i was wheeled into the NICU to see him the neonatologist was waiting. he was smiling. he said. "can you tell we are all breathing easier? no texas children's hospital for this guy. he's really improved." my heart just lept out of my body. i felt like i could breath. then i panicked. the gravity of his situation settled on me. it's funny how i didnt really feel the weight of it until we were out of the woods. God's never ending grace.

tim in the nicu getting news.

my family, tim's family, our entire homegroup, and several precious friends from grace gathered to pray. and wait.

lockett has grown EVERY day since! he's HUGE, happy, and perfectly healthy. he is 6 months old now and laughs, squeals, rolls all around, and is very close to crawling. everyday i just marvel at him. he is sooo very happy. he always has a smile ready for you. i've even seen him smile at me while he was crying. he just couldnt help himself. :)

lockett 2 weeks old.

pieces of conversations from my week

harris: “mom, what’s that on the wall?”
me: “it’s a cross”
harris: “because jesus died?”
me: “well, yes, jesus died on a cross.”
harris: “so we can go to heaven? And play with all the kids up there?”
me: “yes, baby.”

harris: “why is shipley’s donuts over the bridge?”
me: “because they built it there.”
harris: “the new one?”
me: “yes.”
harris: “because you said so?”
me: *smile*

harris: “mom, change me”
me: “WHAT??! Are you serious?you didn’t….”
harris: “yes, i did. Are you angry?”
me: “yes.”
harris: “i love you. now are you angry?”

harris: “why is our baby screaming?”
me: “because he’s teething”
harris: “what?”
me: “he’s getting new teeth. i gave him medicine. and kissed him. he’ll stop screaming soon.”
harris: “oh, you are such a good mom”

me: “why is he crying? what did you do?”
harris: “i bit him.”
me: “WHAT? you bit him? where? how? why!!?”
harris: “on his finger. It just looked good.”
me: “new rule. Never bite your brother.”
me: “how hard did you bite him? Like really, really hard or sorta hard?”

seriously though...

when i saw this picture my first thought was whoa! what happened to my baby boy?! then i got scared. i realized i married a musician who in turn will probably make musician kids. tim has been pushing hard to get harrison a drum set and i have been pushing right back, thinking,

1. i am "noise sensitive"
2. musicians can SOMETIMES run in a strange crowd
3. artists are moody (speaking from experience)
4. i am "noise sensitive"

but, as i watch my precious baby growing up and grabbing every available guitar, drum stick, or djembe, and in the car constantly saying, "song please! song please! louder mom!!" i am slowly beginning to realize i am not sure i can prevent the inevitable. so, i am opting to tell myself (and pray with fervor) that my boys will be worshippers (not just musicians) and when i am walking around with ear muffs on to drown out the noise, just know, as strange as it looks, i am sacrificing comfort (as all moms do) so my boys can be worshippers.

through the eyes........

for christmas we bought harrison one of those fisher price "kid-proof" (we'll see!!) digital cameras. and we just let him go. here are a few of the pictures he took- life through the eyes of a three year old. click here to see entire album.

boys in bunks

i cant believe this day is here. tim and i always talked about having boys in bunk beds some day in our house. well, we -meaning tim and aaron- put together our bunk beds. harrison is still a bit little to sleep on the top but we didnt want to buy beds twice so we took the plunge, bought the bunk beds and harris sleeps on the botton but i know before i turn around he'll be on the top bed and my little lockett will be on the bottom. when tim and i talked about having boys in bunk beds we were barely married and the actual thought of having kids was far, far off. but look at us now. bunk beds.

mr wonderful

obviously this blog is mostly and WILL be mostly about my two boys but i just had to post about my hero husband. my husband is very talented and leans to the artistic side of the thinking realm. which, well, doesnt always lend itself to RATIONAL thinking. but this week our dryer broke. it was spinning its heart out but no heat. i about went into melt down because with a three year old and a 6 month old, laundry is an everyday NECESSARY task-as i type with spit up on my shirt-. tim didnt skip a beat. i was melting down about the expense AND the time it would take to get a repair man to our door. tim came home, took the back off the dryer and HELLO! he fixed it. imagine that. i was just so thrilled, as this is normally out of his comfort area. so, now, on top of his many, many skills, i add: dryer repair man. :)